I recently had a dream that is changing my life, a dream that could have been a nightmare but has inspired me to take dramatic action that is necessary at this evolutionary time in our existence. As someone who has reinvented herself both personally and professionally a great many times, this next step doesn’t feel so big—but it could be.
In the dream I am talking with my mother on a cell phone (this is often how we communicate since she died). I’m telling mom about a plan I had to “engage the most violent men in the most depressed neighborhoods.” She was listening supportively and then we concluded or disconnected, either way it didn’t faze me in the dream. Much of this dream centered around my vehicle being in one parking lot and then, just as I approached it after walking past a very scary house in the dark, another parking lot. 
On the porch of this very scary house in the dark, in a strange neighborhood, sat a gang of men and two or three women. I could not see them, but because of the streetlights, they could see me. Each comment made about me walking by got increasingly lewd and threatening. You can imagine my fear when I saw that my vehicle wasn’t where I arrived, but instead across the street from this very scary house in the dark.
A big black man (about 300 pounds) appeared close to me and I asked him if he’d watch my back. He smiled genuinely and said yes. Then he disappeared. I pictured the scary men in the dark hiding by my vehicle (even though it was under a spotlight) and smashing the windshield after I got in it. I feared using my cell phone, lest they assume I was calling the cops.
But then I asked God, in the dream, what I could do. I saw myself filling up with love and walking right up on their porch, looking them all in the eyes and telling them my story of how I met Ralph “Chitta”, a young black tattooed man who was listening to rap & laying across the only remaining bus seat on my trip out of Baltimore.
I woke up, not finding out whether or not this plan worked, but knowing that a seed of important action had just been planted. Since this dream I have thought about how fear shows up in the body and mind and how many approaches I have to acknowledging, calming, reframing and embracing fear. I now seek to help neutralize fears … in the darkest places where it exists.
Please think for a moment how important it is that we all pursue fearlessness. Won’t you join me in a free and anonymous weekly four-part tele-series, to engage with the forces that lead to violence within. This series is open to everyone but designed for men. For details click here.
